Squirrel.....

This blog is a few days overdue...  It's not that I've been too busy.  It's not that I didn't think of it.  It is simply the fact that my mind feels completely frantic this week and in this place, I have been unable to find the words to write.

I remember a time when I had ducks.  They most certainly did not all line up in a row very often but at times they did.  But at least I had ducks.  Life was full and busy but most days I felt I could conquer whatever came my way by at least getting a few in a line up.

Since my concussion, this has not been the case.  My ducks are gone and squirrels have taken up residence.  Some days the squirrels are able to focus a little and collect nuts and pretend to put them in a row, or maybe just a jumbled pile.  This week in particular though they have been at a rave.

I find myself constantly asking "Where am I and what am I doing?"  Unfortunately, more often than not the answer is "I don't know!!!!"  I am still coming to terms with the new brain this accident has left me with.  One that doesn't seem to handle chaos and overwhelm as easily.  One that is step by step forcing me to look more closely at life and try to keep things a little simpler because it simply can't handle the overload that my old life was filled to overflowing with.  It is forcing me to ask the questions over and over until I actually can stop the spinning and figure out where I am.  It is only then that I can figure out what I am supposed to be doing.