One of the requirements I signed up for when I started this year of mastery was that I would live out my journey publicly. That means being honest and authentic. Generally, I like to believe that I am an honest person. There is one exception and that is when I am struggling. I was raised to paste a smile on my face and carry on as if all is awesome and eventually the way I feel will catch up with how I am acting. This week that is not working for me. Honestly, I am struggling. Absolutely every single thing that I have accomplished this week has been an act of sheer will. Really, all I wanted to do was sit on the couch and eat chocolate.... Lots and lots of chocolate.... Did I mention chocolate....
Today while I was out on my afternoon jaunt, I was trying to figure out what is going on. My goal this week was to focus more on forms. Another moment of honesty - I did not do them. Why? Right now I feel like everything is broken. A couple of weeks ago I had one of those light bulb moments in class. We were talking about the root position for our hands and then the snap into place. I realized that I was totally missing any rotation on the hand returning to my hip. I have been trying to fix it but the process is painful. When I practice my forms I spend so much time trying to figure out how to get to where both hands will snap. I eventually figure it out but for now I feel like my hand techniques are broken. With my knees, all of my kicks are broken. I have to be slow and deliberate with every movement to make sure that my weight is balanced correctly on that knee. If it is the one in the air, well let's just say there is no power (something about slapping a kitten...) Then there is my staff form. The section I am trying to get a handle on is one of the more tricky ones. I was warned that it would take time, possibly months to get one specific technique.
So to sum it up, I feel like my kung fu is totally broken. I am feeling frustrated. I know that the only way to come out of this is to go through and put in the time. As much as I love chocolate - it is not going to solve any of my issues. I know I need to just focus and do it.
On a side note, in spite of all this funky business, I have kept up with my sit ups, push ups and walking.
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 9:
Push ups 7,249
Sit ups 7,505
Kempo 56
Staff 113
Sparring 65
KM 135.3
AoK 183
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 182
Piano 15.8 hours
Books finished 5
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 13 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
So this week I will focus on my forms. I also have a couple of personal goals that need some attention immediately.
Wednesday, 22 April 2015
Thursday, 16 April 2015
Week 8 - Rollercoaster Ride
What a crazy ride this week has been. I have had some definite wins. I have also had some moments of sheer frustration and overwhelm.
The week started off with class on Friday. Honestly, I was dreading class on Friday. We had to perform our weapons form for the class. I knew this. I had been practicing. I did not feel ready. Friday came and I took a deep breath and went to class. I did do my form. Not only did I do my form - I DID NOT DROP MY STAFF!!!! I know I just yelled that but if you have had the pleasure of practicing anywhere near me, you would know just how monumental that truly is. Sifu Hayes and the rest of the class where so encouraging, kind and gracious. It truly went from being an experience that I was ready to run from and turned it into one of my highlights this week. I still have a ton of work to do but it is coming.
Then life set in. My normal schedule is jam packed but this week was really crazy between birthday parties, naturopaths, orthodontists, sick kids and such. I do not thrive on a go, go, go kind of schedule. Knowing that, Monday I took time to get some sun and walk the dog. That sweet beast walked his momma 11.3 km that day. He was one happy pup! Then Tuesday hit with a tire that would not hold air. They don't seem to work as well when you have a screw stuck in them - imagine that. Thought I had that under control until I walked out of kung fu on Wednesday morning and it was low again. I do believe it is finally really fixed. Anyways, just a few more days of chaos and then next week should settle down to my normal crazy.
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 8:
Push ups 6,209
Sit ups 6,385
Kempo 50
Staff 108
Sparring 30
KM 105
AoK 163
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 164
Piano 14.7 hours
Books finished 5
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 10 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
I have finally hit a good groove for push ups and sit ups. I am not where I need to be to have 50,000 at the end of the year, but I am closing the gap. This week I am going to focus on forms. I need to find a way to make doing them part of my daily routine.
The week started off with class on Friday. Honestly, I was dreading class on Friday. We had to perform our weapons form for the class. I knew this. I had been practicing. I did not feel ready. Friday came and I took a deep breath and went to class. I did do my form. Not only did I do my form - I DID NOT DROP MY STAFF!!!! I know I just yelled that but if you have had the pleasure of practicing anywhere near me, you would know just how monumental that truly is. Sifu Hayes and the rest of the class where so encouraging, kind and gracious. It truly went from being an experience that I was ready to run from and turned it into one of my highlights this week. I still have a ton of work to do but it is coming.
Then life set in. My normal schedule is jam packed but this week was really crazy between birthday parties, naturopaths, orthodontists, sick kids and such. I do not thrive on a go, go, go kind of schedule. Knowing that, Monday I took time to get some sun and walk the dog. That sweet beast walked his momma 11.3 km that day. He was one happy pup! Then Tuesday hit with a tire that would not hold air. They don't seem to work as well when you have a screw stuck in them - imagine that. Thought I had that under control until I walked out of kung fu on Wednesday morning and it was low again. I do believe it is finally really fixed. Anyways, just a few more days of chaos and then next week should settle down to my normal crazy.
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 8:
Push ups 6,209
Sit ups 6,385
Kempo 50
Staff 108
Sparring 30
KM 105
AoK 163
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 164
Piano 14.7 hours
Books finished 5
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 10 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
I have finally hit a good groove for push ups and sit ups. I am not where I need to be to have 50,000 at the end of the year, but I am closing the gap. This week I am going to focus on forms. I need to find a way to make doing them part of my daily routine.
Tuesday, 14 April 2015
Really, you had a plan?
As I looked at my calendar for this week I noticed that I had appointments, appointments and more appointments. It's one of those weeks that every day seems to have something beyond the ordinary going on. I thrive when I have lots of downtime in my home. I need these breaks so that I can re-enter the world with a smile on my face (not bearing my teeth). Weeks like this cause me anxiety. I entered the week filled with dread.
Yesterday, I made a plan. I focused. I followed the plan. I stayed present. Caught lots of sun attached to my sweet Guiness. I polished off my honey-do list. It was a great day. I woke up this morning ready to conquer again. I made a plan. I even thought I should blog about the awesomeness of my day yesterday.
I am sitting in the tire shop writing this blog post. That was absolutely not part of the plan. One of my van tires decided that it was not going to hold air any longer. That is a huge plan stopper. I am ever so grateful that they took my van and slipped it in, after all this is tire changeover season. I am doing my best to make the best of this stop. Funny what a difference a couple hours can make.
Thursday, 9 April 2015
Maybe, Just Maybe... - Week 7
Last night I added up my numbers for the first seven weeks and I must admit - there was a happy dance going on in my living room! When I signed up last fall, many of the goals seemed simply unattainable to me (can anyone say push ups!). I was off to a fairly good start for the first little bit but my numbers were not quite where they needed to be and then day 14 stopped me dead in my tracks. I did not give up. I keep pushing myself within the limits my body has for me. I continue to improve. Last week I did 1,120 push ups! That was the full 160 on all seven days. I have to do them in sets that range from 10 to 20 and it takes me much of the day but I am doing them. I just took a peak at where my numbers are based on where they should be. I am definitely behind in most of them but if I can continue on at the pace I set this past week - all of a sudden these physical goals seem like they just may be attainable. I just may be able to make up the ground that I have lost. Now that is motivating!
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 7:
Push ups 5,089
Sit ups 5,265
Kempo 36
Staff 91
Sparring 30
KM 83
AoK 138
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 145
Piano 13.3 hours
Books finished 4
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 8 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 7:
Push ups 5,089
Sit ups 5,265
Kempo 36
Staff 91
Sparring 30
KM 83
AoK 138
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 145
Piano 13.3 hours
Books finished 4
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 8 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
Monday, 6 April 2015
Am I Giving It My All?
I just finished reading Today Matters - 12 Daily Practices to Guarantee Tomorrow's Success by John Maxwell. It was an excellent read. He has dedicated his life to living out the practices he writes about. This book was jam packed with amazing true stories about people and powerful quotes. This one was found near the beginning and really spoke to me during this season in life.
John Wooden was a basketball coach for more than forty years and only coached one losing season, his rookie season. He lead UCLA to four undefeated seasons and a record ten NCAA championships, including seven in a row. His emphasis on practice was key to the success of his teams. He used to tell his players, "You have to give 100 percent every day. Whatever you don't give, you can't make up for tomorrow. If you give only 75 percent today, you can't give 125 percent tomorrow to make up for it."
In the book, John Maxwell tells of an opportunity have lunch with John Wooden. He had heard that the coach carried something with him at all times that contains his life philosophy. He asked to see it. He pulled out two cards, exactly the same. One was his reminder for himself. The other was one he carried so he could share it. On the card was this statement...
"Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming."
At the time of this meeting, coach John Wooden was ninety-two years old.
This spoke to why I agreed to start this mastery journey. I was not at peace with how I was living. I knew that I was capable of so much more. I want to be the best me that I can be. The only way to truly do that is to give my best, my 100% at all times. I confess, that much of the time I am giving far less than 100%. Recording my numbers, I can easily see the flow up and down. It makes it harder to deny those less than days (or weeks). I am finding the exercise of totalling my numbers and journaling at the end of each day very revealing. This weekend was more full of ups than downs. My knee is still bothering me a lot. I really can't seem to keep my stick off the floor during my form. But I worked hard this weekend. My numbers were really up. I went to bed last night absolutely exhausted but feeling at peace. I want more days like that.
John Wooden was a basketball coach for more than forty years and only coached one losing season, his rookie season. He lead UCLA to four undefeated seasons and a record ten NCAA championships, including seven in a row. His emphasis on practice was key to the success of his teams. He used to tell his players, "You have to give 100 percent every day. Whatever you don't give, you can't make up for tomorrow. If you give only 75 percent today, you can't give 125 percent tomorrow to make up for it."
In the book, John Maxwell tells of an opportunity have lunch with John Wooden. He had heard that the coach carried something with him at all times that contains his life philosophy. He asked to see it. He pulled out two cards, exactly the same. One was his reminder for himself. The other was one he carried so he could share it. On the card was this statement...
"Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming."
At the time of this meeting, coach John Wooden was ninety-two years old.
This spoke to why I agreed to start this mastery journey. I was not at peace with how I was living. I knew that I was capable of so much more. I want to be the best me that I can be. The only way to truly do that is to give my best, my 100% at all times. I confess, that much of the time I am giving far less than 100%. Recording my numbers, I can easily see the flow up and down. It makes it harder to deny those less than days (or weeks). I am finding the exercise of totalling my numbers and journaling at the end of each day very revealing. This weekend was more full of ups than downs. My knee is still bothering me a lot. I really can't seem to keep my stick off the floor during my form. But I worked hard this weekend. My numbers were really up. I went to bed last night absolutely exhausted but feeling at peace. I want more days like that.
Saturday, 4 April 2015
Making Miles - Week 6
Last week was a week of making miles. We started the week out by heading to Calgary for the first part of spring break. The weather was extraordinary for most of it. We were also blessed to spend most of the time with my 3 year old nephew who is an absolute ray of sunshine. We went to the pool, the park, walked along the river and hit the zoo.
Many of my numbers last week were much lower than they should have been. The change in routine proved to be a bit of an undoing for my push ups and sit ups. While my numbers on paper do not show that last week was very successful, it was in other ways. I was mindful of my goals and did make progress towards some personal ones. I relaxed and read while the kids played in the pool. I sat in the sun and had a cup of tea with a very dear friend that I rarely get a face to face with. I walked 25km total in our many outings which almost doubled my YTD number. The highlight of the week was definitely my one-on-one date with Waylon. We went on a 8km geocaching mission in Fish Creek Provincial Park. We found three caches, absolutely could not find one and had some good laughs along the way.
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 6:
Push ups 3,969
Sit ups 4,145
Kempo 29
Staff 53
Sparring 30
KM 53.3
AoK 116
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 127
Piano 10.92 hours
Books finished 3
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 7 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
Heading into this week, my goal is to stay mindful of using each day and moment intentionally. I have had a couple good days again with the push ups and sit ups. I plan to maintain that. I will be focusing more on forms this week. My knee still does not allow me to do them full out but I will be working on them.
Many of my numbers last week were much lower than they should have been. The change in routine proved to be a bit of an undoing for my push ups and sit ups. While my numbers on paper do not show that last week was very successful, it was in other ways. I was mindful of my goals and did make progress towards some personal ones. I relaxed and read while the kids played in the pool. I sat in the sun and had a cup of tea with a very dear friend that I rarely get a face to face with. I walked 25km total in our many outings which almost doubled my YTD number. The highlight of the week was definitely my one-on-one date with Waylon. We went on a 8km geocaching mission in Fish Creek Provincial Park. We found three caches, absolutely could not find one and had some good laughs along the way.
Here are my YTD totals as of the end of week 6:
Push ups 3,969
Sit ups 4,145
Kempo 29
Staff 53
Sparring 30
KM 53.3
AoK 116
Personal Goals:
Gratitude Journal 127
Piano 10.92 hours
Books finished 3
Daily fruit - haven't missed a day!!!
365 photo challenge - 7 days missed
Daily journal - missed 2 days
Heading into this week, my goal is to stay mindful of using each day and moment intentionally. I have had a couple good days again with the push ups and sit ups. I plan to maintain that. I will be focusing more on forms this week. My knee still does not allow me to do them full out but I will be working on them.
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