This morning I went back and read that little reminder I wrote for myself last week. I needed the reminder today, well actually I constantly need it....
Monday I woke up to a calendar with white space on it. I thought it would bring a sense of relief as I systematically worked my way through all the backlog of stuff I have to do. Keep my mind still and present on what I am doing, just tick things off one by one. Sounds dreamy!
Instead on Monday my brain ran around frantically wanting to do it all, all at the same time. I kept trying to reign it in. I did manage to get an impressive list of things ticked off. I had times where I was focused and then there were other times where I have no idea where the hour went.
Tuesday I woke up to that wet hazy weather and felt really funky. Started my morning off with another dog therapy session in the wet and muck. The rest of the day went better. I made a plan and one by one did the plan. Yet my mind was still so restless.
The rest of the week has been pretty much the same. On task at times, all over the place the next. This morning has been a real all over the place kinda day. Deep breathe. Be still, be present. Make a plan. Work the plan. Stop thinking about everything else.
I know Yoda does not believe in trying... It is either do or not do. In this case I hope he is wrong. I want to do. Haven't figured out how to do, especially not consistently. I am working to put myself back where I belong. I am trying and today that is all I have.
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