So Tuesday I was feeling a lot of different emotions.
For most students in kung fu, you've moved up through the classes as you progress through the belts. Those of us who have attended the morning class, we have not had that experience. I started in the morning class nearly seven years ago. Outside of joining the IHC, I have primarily only attended this one class until recently. I am used to a multi-belt environment. Stepping into a class designed solely for a higher belt level was very intimidating.
Then there was that the fact that I felt really old. Not just a little old. But really old. For the first time in my life, I was going to step on the mats and every student was young enough to be one of my children. Oy.... These teens and young adults are incredible. I have watched them grow up and progress. So old and intimidated were definitely in the mix...
There were moments on the drive to class where I considered just going for a cup of tea instead. This month has been hard. There has been a great deal going on in our family life and it has just been so busy that I can't even wrap my brain around where the days have gone. I wasn't sure I had it in me to put myself out there. The risk seemed like almost too much.
Instead, I did what I have always done. Just drove to the kwoon. Through anxiety, fear, excitement, overwhelm, joy, tears... You name it, I have just always drove to the kwoon. And I was really happy I did on Tuesday!
The class on Tuesday was fantastic. It was challenging. I still felt a little like a fish out of water but it was doable. I was happy in the end that I showed up.
Rumour has it that next week is fitness... I am sure that I am going to feel old and really like a fish out of water but I am going to keep pushing myself out of that comfort zone.
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