Wednesday, 15 August 2018

Tornado Brain

Tornado - a violent rotating column of air

So... Substitute air for thoughts and that is where my brain seems to have been for much of the summer. 

I am struggling.  My brain is full and busy and spinning and overwhelmed.  Thoughts pop in and out at an astounding speed.  The popping in is a bit of an issue.  The popping out is seeming to be a huge issue.  I seem to be unable to hold onto my thoughts long enough to remember what I was doing, what I was going to do and what I need to do.  I am finding that I am writing myself little notes all over the place just trying to capture it all.

The result is that my life feels like it is in turmoil.  I feel like things are falling through the cracks.  I know that many of my requirements are falling through the cracks.  It is not that I don't want to do my requirements.  I am finding that I am getting to the end of the day and it just has not happened.  I'm not sure where the day has gone.  I spend my days busy.  I am doing things that need doing.  I can see progress in many areas of life yet  I just feel like I can't get any real traction.

The one requirement that I know will be the most helpful in this situation is also the one requirement that I am finding the absolute hardest to do right now.  Yup, journalling...  I have been relatively faithfully writing in a journal daily since I started the IHC.  It is a place to sort out  my thoughts and process life.  Lately I look at my book and I struggle to even open it.  When I do get it open, I just stare at it.  I am finding it hard to quiet my brain long enough to form a coherent thought to then get it written on the page. 

I have also struggled to blog.  It's not that I don't have things to blog about.  I have thoughts all the time about what I should sit down and blog about.  It's just that when I sit down to do the actually work, my brain spins.  It feels like that little spinning icon that you see when the internet is looking for a webpage that just is not responding.  It spins and spins.  Then the message that it is unable to find the content it was looking for.

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