One of my personal requirements since I started this journey years ago was to keep a daily personal reflection and prayer journal. It was to be my daily check in with myself. A time to look at my successes, to look at where I am falling short and to make a plan for correction. Keeping a daily eye on where you are and where you want to be helps to keep life a little more on course. Even when it is off course, you know exactly where the issue is. No hiding....
I have found over the past year or so that a pattern has developed in my daily journals. One of my character attributes is that I set very high standards for myself. This is a benefit in the sense that it I am always wanting to grow and learn to improve myself. There is a not so awesome side to this too though. I am not always realistic when setting expectations for myself. Really, why can't I do it all, perfectly, right now... As I reflect back looking at my journals, there is a great deal of negativity. I wake up ready to face the day. I make a list of things to get done that no mere mortal can accomplish. I obviously do not even make a small dent in it. Then I journal about how I failed again. Not a great way to close a day. Not great thoughts to be filling my mind with as I drift off to sleep. Then I would get tired of the cycle so I would take a break from journaling. Then I would get upset with myself for that as well. Negative, negative, negative....
This last week I've been experimenting with journaling in the morning instead. I have to say - I am loving it!!! Mornings are so filled with hope and promise. This gives me a place and space to work through my thoughts when they are in a positive light. This allows me to look at my day very proactively. I am working through my tendencies to over plan and over expect. I am working through how to be more realistic with myself and then be kinder to myself. I am working through the managing my emotions during the stresses of life (especially the stresses I place upon myself trying to be perfect). This is allowing me to set a positive intention for my day and gives me a place to go back and really look at it. If I want to sit and journal again at night, the option is still there. I am finding though, that the lens that I use to look at my day is a little less clouded with negativity when I look at it after a good nights sleep.
Just a small tweak but over the last week, I have seen huge benefits already.
I found journaling in the evening to be challenging as well. Maybe I will also give morning entries a shot.
ReplyDeleteI found journaling in the evening to be challenging as well. Maybe I will also give morning entries a shot.
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